“Rodina” means family, roughly, in Czech. Lots of gravestones are marked “Family Blahblah”. Anyway, I’m puzzled as to why rodina Hajkova fancied having their N backwards. It’s a Cyrillic letter, but Czech doesn’t use Cyrillic letters (and it’s not the Cyrllic N, either).

Too much becherovka for the stonemason, perhaps? Answers on a postcard, please.

It’s funny. Sally Fay looks very good in those sorts of dresses but I would rather run a mile than wear them. No prairie revival for Essex girls.

What do English girls listen to in America? French radio, over the internet. Radio Deliro’s description is “French varieties, before 70s jazz and blues, 15% of J.S. Bach and 10% of uncommon”. As the soundtrack to pad thai and editing the latest photoshoot I did with California Girl Extraordinaire Sally Fay for Sugar Town Vintage (pictures coming soon!), it’s 100% choette.

Jack & Hill: A Beauty Blog are using this photograph of mine to illustrate a post about false eyelashes (of course).

They didn’t ask first (sigh) but my trusty spies found it for me and I like the blog, so I’m happy. Encouraging false eyelash wearing may well be my calling in life. Ladies, go and post your eyelash experiences on Jack & Hill immediately!

PS–Their recent PR doozies of the day post is hilarious. I should start posting some of the nonsense that arrives in my inbox each morning, too. Seriously, if anyone reading this works in PR and needs a proof reader, call me.

Seeing as a) my last two entries have been about Poland and b) one of my primary concerns in life is whether or not I should ever move back to London, this story from The Sun seems appropriate. Warning: it includes the scariest photo caption ever: “Blade … knife like one used in pizza diner by willy chop Pole“.

Enjoy.

My top priority while in Poland was to copy Magda and find a smiley.

On my last night in Poland, I was so tired and sick that when we hit our final bar of the night I lost a little bit of my mind.

I went into the bathroom and when I came out I couldn’t find The Baron, so I thought he must’ve gone to the bathroom too. I waited and waited, then looked outside a bit, then waited some more, then looked in the other room again just to make sure I didn’t miss him, then waited some more, then went outside, and so on.

A man with wild hair went over to the piano and started playing exuberantly, and I still could find no trace of The Baron.

It suddenly dawned on me that he didn’t ever get his passport in time and that I’d come on the trip alone and had somehow made it to Poland but had no idea what had happened in the intervening two weeks, because obviously I’d been in some kind of lengthy hallucination.

I spent at least a minute in total horror, starting to question how I could be sure I was even in Poland at all, or if perhaps I’d never left LA, and then in walked The Baron from some little room I hadn’t noticed, where he’d been waiting for me all along.

The tables were made from antique Singer sewing machines, and I worked the foot pedal for the rest of the night as I sucked down three more krupniki.

My London spy just filed this report:

Had the most stressful coffee ever with Gaelle. First 2 random drunks had a fight, then another random drunk passed out cold for ages, an ambulance turned up, but didnt take him away as some other chav/pal turned up to help him, then all the drunks in the area(who all seem to know each other) kept turning up and disappearing and general loitering, anf shouting. The fighting 2 came back and had another wee scrap…. and so on and so on. Me and gaelle were trapped so long in starbucks that the starbucks man gave us some free coffee… christ!

…And May Your Last Words Be A Chance To Make Things Better, Magnetophone
(I Don’t Have the Time To) Mess Around, The Broken Family Band
2-Step, Low
60 Revolutions, Gogol Bordello
1979, Garmonbozia
A Bigger Graveyard, Women And Children
A Method, TV On the Radio
A Plague On Both Your Houses, Chris T-T
A Pretty Girl Is Like …, The Magnetic Fields
A Sad Ha Ha (Circled My Demise), Magnetophone
A Whorehouse Is Any House, Bonnie Prince Billy
A Word Of Advice, Fog
Abattoir Blues, Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds
Absolutely Cuckoo, The Magnetic Fields
After All, Mojave 3
Aladdin’s Story, Death In Vegas
All My Little Words, The Magnetic Fields
All Night Stand, Ray Davies
All Said + Done, Dios
All Tomorrow’s Parties, Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds
Always On My Mind, Johnny Cash & Willie Nelson